


Comfort In Your Silence

by Akiragane



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: ASL/SEE, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, But also like heart-wrenching angst, Deaf Kokichi, F/M, Fluff, He's also human, I'll edit this in the morning, M/M, Mentions of Attempted Suicide, Suicide trigger warning, for plot convience, nonbinary k1-b0, slowburn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:55:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27706574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiragane/pseuds/Akiragane
Summary: Kokichi Ouma is deaf, he lost his hearing when he was 13. His entire world is muffled sounds and meaningless words coming out of his people's mouths.When Saihara meets him for the first time, it comes as a surprise, and he finds himself trying his best to learn ASL to accommodate to him. His friends think he's learning a useless skill.
Relationships: Minor or Background Relationship(s), Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Comments: 77
Kudos: 289





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is me after watching A Silent Voice and crying like four times. That shit's sad man.
> 
> I think someone else made a deaf Kokichi au but do I remember who? Of course not.
> 
> Anyways enjoy.

The bell jingled as Shuichi practically fell through the door. Kaede looked up from behind the counter and smiled at him. "Right on time, lucky you." she teased.

Shuichi shot her a look as he rushed to the back and changed into his uniform in record time. He came back out and Maki immediately switched places with him on the register. Shuichi didn't really have any room to complain. 

"You should really start getting here earlier if you don't want to get fired." Maki scowled, grabbing out more almond milk from the fridge. 

Shuichi let out an awkward laugh. "Sorry, I think I slept through my alarm, or it just didn't go off. I promise I'll try to be better."

Kaede slapped Maki lightly on the shoulder. "Hey, lay off him, will ya?" she said. "It's not like we were super busy or anything."

Maki just rolled her eyes and slammed the small fridge shut. "Whatever." she handed Kaede the milk jug. "I'm going on break, Kaito's blowing up my phone and if I don't answer he will sprint here."

Kaede laughed as Maki stormed into the back. Shuichi let out an audible sigh of relief. "She's scary..." he murmured to himself.

"Oh, c'mon, you know she's not that bad," Kaede replied, setting the jug down and drumming her fingers on the handle. "She may seem a little cold, but then again so can you."

Shuichi put a hand over his chest. "I'm offended," he said, barely containing a smile, Kaede's sunshiny behaviour was contagious. "Are you going to say I haven't outlived my emo phase next?"

Kaede raised an eyebrow. "Well, have you?"

Shuichi took a moment to consider that. "Okay, touche, but at least I can ride a bicycle without training wheels."

Kaede gasped loudly and lightly hit Shuichi on the shoulder. "Hey! They're very hard to ride, okay?!"

Shuichi laughed loudly and tried to shield himself from Kaede's tiny punches that barely did any damage. "Okay okay, I'm sorry, truce?"

Kaede let out an exasperated sigh, but she was still smiling. "Truce." she agreed.

The bell jingled and Shuichi straightened. Two people walked in, one with dark purple hair and a platinum blonde. Shuichi smiled at them, but neither of them saw him. They seemed to be engaged in conversation... without talking.

The blonde was rapidly moving their hands in different motions, and the purple-haired one watched them carefully before replying with similar motions. It was... weird. Shuichi blinked, so concentrated on them he barely realized they were right in front of him. The blonde waved and smiled. "Hi," they said.

Shuichi snapped out of it. "Ah, hello. What can I get you two?"

The blonde turned to their friend and did the hand motions again. The boy stared up at the menu intently, before replying. Shuichi was absolutely bewildered, but also fascinated.

"One medium hot chocolate and one large frappuccino with extra expression, cream, and sugar if that's okay." the blonde said with a smile.

Shuichi nodded and typed it in, then handed the order ticket to Kaede, who immediately got to work. Shuichi charged them and went through the normal exchange of receiving money and handing change back, but for some reason, his curiosity got the better of him and he blurted out, "How did you do that?"

The blonde cocked their head, before a look of realization crossed their face. "Oh, sorry that did probably look a little weird. We were doing sign language. My friend here, Kokichi, is deaf so I translate for them."

Shuichi trained his gaze on the newly-named boy, Kokichi. He was staring right back at him as if daring him to ask another stupid question. Shuichi swallowed. "That... that makes sense..."

Kokichi narrowed his eyes. "Keebo, what's he saying?" he asked.

Shuichi looked stunned. He could... talk? And in perfect Japanese as well? His voice didn't sound at all squeaky or even wavered at all. Keebo apologized in sign language apparently and probably described their conversation. Kokichi took a deep breath and looked back over at Shuichi. "Sorry, I'm tired, if you have any questions I'm not in the mood," he quickly explained.

Questions? How did he know? Was this something he got often? Probably... that was so strange.

Kaede presented them with the drinks and Keebo quickly thanked her, Kokichi immediately tearing into what had to be the most sugary beverage Shuichi had ever seen. Keebo waved goodbye and the exited the cafe. Shuichi blinked. Kaede leaned on her hand with her elbows on the table. "Huh... that's interesting," she commented. "You think he'll come back sometime?"

_I hope so..._

The next day Shuichi had the same shift, and the interaction with the deaf boy was still playing through his mind. He vaguely wondered if he'd come again today. He really wanted to ask him questions, plus maybe when he wasn't so moody he'd be a lot of fun to talk to.

Maki could tell something was distracting him, and she scolded him several times about it. Shuichi apologized a lot that day, but again the cafe wasn't very crowded. That's what Shuichi liked about this job, it was mostly quiet, a place where he could just get lost in his thoughts and relax, and get paid for it.

The smell of coffee and lavender was strong, Shuichi wondered what would happen if he just fell asleep here, until the door jingle snapped him awake. He looked up and really choked on air.

The purple-haired boy was back, dragging Keebo along with him. Kokichi practically slammed his hands on the counter and got right up in Shuichi's face. "Whatever the fuck was in that coffee it was the best goddamn thing I've ever had," he said with a huge smile on his face.

He was so close. Shuichi shrunk down. "Oh... um..." he looked over at Keebo, who signed him a gesture, pointing at him.

Shuichi cleared his throat and signed it back. Kokichi beamed again and sat back on his heels. Shuichi raised an eyebrow. "What did that mean?" he asked.

Keebo repeated the gesture and replied, "It means 'thank you' in sign."

Oh, that made sense. Kokichi giggled and pulled Keebo into him, whispered something in their ear. Keebo signed something back and Kokichi nodded. Keebo sighed with a smile. "Right, anyways can we get the same thing as yesterday, if you remember what that was?"

Shuichi smiled and nodded. "Yeah, here give me a second... Maki!" he called back. "Med Hot Choc and Large Frapp with the works and extra expresso!"

"Whoever ordered that is gonna get diabetes!" she called back but started making it anyways.

Shuichi laughed and looked back at them. "You seemed to be in a better mood today," he commented.

Kokichi deadpanned and Shuichi realized, slapping his hands over his face in embarrassment. He peeked out to look at Keebo. "How do I say 'I'm sorry'?" he whispered.

Keebo laughed and signed the proper gesture, and Shuichi mirrored it. Kokichi laughed and signed as he spoke. "It's okay, I'm kinda used to it by now. But if you want to tell me something just ask Keebo to translate it for you."

Keebo signed something with an offended face and Kokichi giggled. The two had their own little conversation which apparently was a lot of teasing on Kokichi's part.

Eventually, Maki came over with the drinks and handed them to Shuichi, who handed them to the two. Kokichi started drinking on his immediately, a content expression going across his face. Keebo signed a thank you and the two moved to leave, but suddenly Kokichi stopped and looked over at Shuichi. "By the way... what's your name?" he asked.

Shuichi wasn't sure how to answer that. Keebo gave him the thumbs up and he cleared his throat. "Shuichi Saihara..." he replied.

Keebo finger spelt the words and Kokichi nodded once, looking back again to smile at him again, and at that point, Shuichi realized just how attractive he really was, and felt his face going red.

"Nice meeting you, Shumai! Smell ya later!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Never let me watch movies. This is what happens.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shuuchi starts learning sign language (JSL) just so he could communicate better with those who are deaf (but really it's specifically for Kokichi)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let it be known that I am currently in the process of learning ASL/SEE and it is d i f f i c u l t. It's pretty much the same as learning a second language, and I already am learning French so this is just another thing. But I'm going to try because it's honestly such a useful skill to have, and I recommend trying it to everyone reading.

"What are you doing?"

Shuichi jumped a mile in the air, slamming his laptop down. "Nothing!" he squeaked.

Kaede gave him a look, Shuichi never was a good liar. He sighed and opened his laptop back up, displaying the chart with the sign alphabet. His friend looked down and gasped. "You're learning JSL?" she asked. "Shuichi, that's amazing!"

Shuichi looked down, tipping his hat to hide his face. "Um, yeah... I just thought it would be useful to learn, y'know?" he admitted. "But it's a lot harder than I thought, and I'm having a bit of trouble memorizing everything."

Kaede shot him a look, wiggling her eyebrows. "You sure it's not for that deaf boy that's been coming in lately?"

Shuichi flushed even redder and turned away. "Of course not! Why would you think that? I just..." he sighed. "I just want to be able to communicate better with people who can't always communicate with me with voice."

Kaede nodded, but Shuichi could tell she wasn't entirely convinced. She scanned the chart and tried some of the letters for herself. "Hm, you're right. Did you think about getting a tutor?"

"I wouldn't even know where to start," he said. "I don't know anyone other than Kokichi and his translator that know sign."

Kaede hummed, making a thinking face. "Well... then I could help you! We can learn to sign together!" she beamed. "We can even get Maki in on it too!"

Shuichi raised his eyebrows in surprise. "You would really help me with that?" he asked.

"Of course! It would be a good skill for all of us to learn!" she said, sitting down in the other chair in the break room. "Now... let's get this alphabet down!"

Shuichi smiled. He was really grateful for a friend like Kaede. They spent fifteen-ish minutes working with the alphabet and memorizing it. They didn't get it all before they had to go back to work, but Shuichi practised by himself when no one was around. Kaede wasn't entirely wrong when she said he wanted to learn it for Kokichi, but he also knew that learning JSL would be good in general. That was the reason he held onto because he was that kind of selfless person.

All that resolve chucked itself out the window when the bell jingled to reveal Kokichi, Keebo coming right behind him. Kokichi came up to the counter, hopping up and down on the balls on his feet, impatiently waiting for Keebo to catch up. Shuichi gave them both a wave. "Heyo, same as usual?" he asked.

Keebo signed something to Kokichi and the other shook his head. "Nah, wanna try something different," he replied in both sign and his voice.

Kokichi's eyes trained up to the menu and then he locked eyes with Shuichi. "Large vanilla latte with whipped cream and cinnamon."

Shuichi smiled and typed it in. "And for you?" he asked Keebo.

Keebo let out an awkward laugh. "I think I'll have the same," they replied. "Your hot chocolate is honestly to die for."

"If that ain't the truth," Kaede called from her post behind the coffee machine.

Shuichi laughed and went through the same exchange as always. Then he stared Keebo dead in the eyes. "Um, by the way... me and my friends want to learn sign language, and we were wondering if you had any advice?"

Keebo gasped loudly, Kokichi cocked his head, obviously confused. Keebo quickly signed the situation to him and his eyes widened. "You want to learn sign?" Kokichi asked Shuichi, who nodded. "Good luck, it's kinda hard to learn at first." Kokichi laughed.

"The best thing I can advise is just practice as often as you can, memorize everything." Keebo pointed out. "And don't give up. I wish you luck with that."

Kaede came over with the drinks and handed them to their respective owners. Kokichi took a long sip from his and came back with a moustache from the cream. "Omigod it's sooooooo good..." he said.

Shuichi smiled unconsciously. Then he pointed to his mouth. Kokichi furrowed his brow, then Shuichi put a finger under his nose and pointed at Kokichi, trying to communicate without words. Kokichi got the hint and wiped at his mouth to get the cream off, he then signed a thank you with a smile and turned to leave with Keebo.

Kaede came up behind Shuichi and snickered. "Yeah, totally not learning sign for the cute deaf boy." she teased.

Shuichi blushed and covered his face with his hands. "Shut up..." he mumbled.

Shuichi followed Keebo's advice and kept at it. Maki wasn't part of their little project to help sign on account of she said it was a waste of time. Shuichi tried reasoning with her but she ignored him every time. He knew she wasn't trying to be closed-minded but she was having a hard time understand why she should learn something like JSL.

Regardless, Shuichi would spend hours in front of his laptop with tutorials teaching him the proper hand signs for specific things. He memorized the alphabet and could fingerspell decently, he learned basic introductions and especially learned how to ask questions regarding parts of his job, stuff like 'What would you like?' and 'What size do you want that?' as well as being able to name the prices.

Kaede was slightly behind him, probably since she did have a bit more of a busy life than he did. But every time they saw each other she would practice by saying good morning in sign and he would help her during their breaks and at times when the shop wasn't busy.

But his favourite part was when Kokichi came in with Keebo and he would sign to them, he wasn't good enough to have a full conversation quite yet, but Kokichi seemed really proud of him for trying, and Shuichi was almost always rewarded with that beautiful smile of his.

So, one night Shuichi drummed his fingers on his knee, laptop in front of him from his position on his bed, a video pulled up, titled 'How to Ask Out Someone in JSL'. He swallowed, he knew he had a long way to go before he could actually ask Kokichi out on a proper date, and he didn't even know if he'd say yes. Shuichi wanted to be able to have a proper conversation with him, so he had to learn as much as he could.

He pressed play on the video and watched as the girl explained how to formulate the correct hand signs to properly ask a person on a date.

The next day Shuichi was feeling particularly perky, after all, he had a good feeling that day.

But when the bell jingled Kokichi didn't walk through the door. Keebo did, and they had an expression on that immediately raised red flags in Shuichi's head. "Good morning," Keebo said and signed.

"Good morning..." Shuichi replied the same way. "If I may ask... where's Kokichi?" Shuichi asked, trying his best to sign.

Keebo bit their lip. "Uh, he wasn't feeling all that well today, I think his stomach was bothering him or something. He asked me to pick up a drink for him."

Shuichi's heart sank. "Oh okay... what can I get you then?"

"Hot chocolate and small black coffee please."

More red flags. Shuichi knew simply from watching Kokichi that he liked surgery stuff and a lot of it. But he didn't want to pry so he just put the order in without complaint and handed the ticket to Kaede, who furrowed her brow, clearing also sensing the abnormalness of it. But she said nothing either and just made the drinks as Keebo paid for the stuff. When all was said and done Keebo thanked them and turned to leave.

"Uh, wait!" Shuichi stopped them.

Keebo stopped and turned around. Shuichi swallowed thickly. "Tell... tell Kokichi that I hope he gets better soon, okay?"

Silence, then Keebo smiled. "You can tell him yourself. Would you like me to give you his phone number?"

Shuichi blinked, not really registering the question at first, and then he nodded rapidly. "Yes... yes, I would love that! Thank you!"

Keebo chuckled and placed the cups down on a nearby table and grabbed a napkin, scribbling something on it and handing it to Shuichi. "Good luck," they remarked with a wink, then grabbed the cups and left.

Shuichi looked down at the note in his hand. He couldn't contain the smile on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized halfway through this chapter that the entire time I've been spelling Shuichi's name wrong and now I feel stupid.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Text messages and asking questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My motivation said THIS
> 
> I apologize for updating so often I just got like a burst of inspiration for this fic alone and it's killing me too.

Shuichi stared at his phone on his desk, the text app open, the little blinker that signalled it was ready for a text message going off innocently. He really didn't know where to start with this. He considered calling but then realized that would be stupid.

He took a deep breath and picked up his phone.

**Me:**

Hey, Kokichi. This is Shuichi, from the coffee shop.

Keebo gave me your number.

He nearly threw his phone. He was absolutely terrified for the response and also incredibly excited, and those two mixed together to form just a kind of anxiousness. Shuichi wasn't sure what to do, what if Kokichi didn't care enough about him to respond? Or Keebo gave him the wrong number? So many bad possibilities.

But then again, there were the good ones as well.

His phone bleeped and he slowly cracked an eye open.

**Kokichi:**

hey shumai!!! how r u?

Shuichi breathed a sigh of relief and typed his response.

**Me:**

I'm good, just got home. How about you?

**Kokichi:**

im at my friend's house, keebo and their girlfriend

**Me:**

Oh, I'm sorry. Did I interrupt something?

**Kokichi:**

nah ur gud

theyre just makin out rn anyways

wassup?

**Me:**

Nothing much, really. I did want to ask you something though.

**Kokichi:**

k, shoot

Shuichi tensed, did he really feel comfortable enough in his JSL to be able to have a proper conversation with Kokichi, let alone go on a date with him? He slammed his forehead against his phone. This was so much harder than it should've been.

He took a deep breath and carefully typed it in.

**Me:**

Is your stomach feeling better?

He pressed send. Yes, he was chickening out of it, but he really didn't care. After all, asking someone out over text did seem a little bit rude and unconventional, and he would've learned all that JSL for doing so for nothing.

**Kokichi:**

is that what keebo told you?

**Me:**

Huh?

**Kokichi:**

my stomach's fine

my mother took me to doctors today

hearing stuffs

**Me:**

Why didn't Keebo just tell me that?

**Kokichi:**

dunno

ill be back tomorrow tho

i kno u missed me ;)

**Me:**

I was just worried about you is all.

**Kokichi:**

yea, u missed me ;))))

Shuichi laughed to himself. Maybe tomorrow he would gather the courage to finally tell Kokichi how he felt.

The two ended up texting for a solid hour until Kokichi signalled that he was leaving and would have to sign off. Shuichi typed a goodbye and put his phone down, leaning back in his chair. He didn't know why but that really felt like he had a proper conversation with Kokichi.

He opened his laptop and once again started practising his sign language, he knew he would need it tomorrow. He didn't even realize when three hours had passed and his uncle called him down for dinner.

Shuichi ran down the stairs and practically jumped into his seat, quickly muttering a thank you before practically attacking his food. His uncle blinked at him in surprise. "Shuichi, slow down, you're going to give yourself heartburn," he said with a hearty laugh.

Shuichi swallowed quickly and shrank down in his seat. "Sorry, Uncle..." he mumbled.

"Are you in a hurry or something? What were you doing upstairs?"

"Texting a friend..." Shuichi explained.

His uncle raised an eyebrow. "Really now? Was it that girl, Kaede? Maki? Or was it that lovely young man Kaito?"

"None of them. It's... a new friend. His name is Kokichi."

"Oh, you'll have to introduce me some time to him."

"Yeah... I will... eventually."

Shuichi quickly ran into the shop and went to get changed, popping out just before Maki was going to raise her voice to yell at him to get out here. "Morning," he spoke, signing it to her.

Maki scowled. "Why do you keep doing that stuff with your hands?" she asked.

"Sign language, I need as much practice as I can," Shuichi said as he went up to the register. "It's not useless, y'know. When you start working with kids you might need to learn it."

Maki tensed. "I don't want to work with kids, I hate kids." she tried to argue.

Shuichi knew better. Maki was incredible with children, always offering help when people with kids come in and the little ones get out of hand. She was a magician with children, always knowing the right thing to say or do when she was around them, and kids seemed to always love her. Shuichi had even caught her sneaking tiny cookies she'd always set aside for them to them made from the extra dough from the normal cookies, and he always turned a blind eye to it.

"Uh-huh, yeah sure." he agreed sarcastically.

Maki glared at him. Shuichi smiled and made a heart with his hands. She rolled her eyes and resumed her work. The day went on, and Shuichi was silently counting the minutes to the time when Kokichi and Keebo usually came around.

Eventually, the bell jingled and Shuichi saw his favourite head of purple hair, sans his translator. Shuichi smiled before signing 'Where Keebo?'

Kokichi shrugged. "They got a job as a translator for a local theatre, so they're doing an early show there right now. I'm getting coffee for them before they start," he explained, hands moving fast as he talked.

Shuichi let out a snort. 'They nervous?'

"Oh, yeah, definitely. They were freaking out earlier. But I think they're excited as well. I wish I could go to one of the shows they're working."

Shuichi then got an idea, but he wasn't entirely sure how to formulate the words. He pulled out his phone and started typing. Maki yelled at him for being on his phone but then she heard Kokichi's phone vibrate and stopped talking. Kokichi pulled out his phone and smiled down at it.

**Shumai:**

What shows are they working at? Maybe we could go to one together.

Kokichi laughed, putting his phone away. "I know they're working one tonight at six, are you off then?" he asked.

Shuichi nodded. 'Yes,' he replied. 'Can I pick you up?'

"Nah, I can get there myself. It's at the Misaki theatre. Tickets are about 900 yen."

'I will be there.'

Kokichi beamed. "Awesome! Okay, now for the drinks!"

He ordered and Shuichi typed it in. Maki was already on it and made them in record time. She handed them over to Kokichi and he signed a makeshift thank you with the drinks in his hands. Shuichi smiled. 'See you tonight,' he signed.

Kokichi smiled. "See ya, Shumai," he said before he walked out the door.

Shuichi knew he was grinning like an idiot, but he couldn't help himself. He successfully scored a date with Kokichi... ah, wait. What if he didn't think of it as a date? What if Kokichi just thought of this as a normal friend hang out? And then there was the age-old question... what if Kokichi wasn't even into guys?

Oh, he probably royally screwed up with this.

"Hey," Maki spoke. "Is he deaf?" she asked.

Shuichi looked over at her. He nodded. She crossed her arms. "So that's why you're learning sign. Why'd you drag Kaede into it?" she asked.

"Maki..." he sighed. "Listen, yes part of the reason I'm doing this is because of Kokichi, but another part of it is genuinely because I want to learn and better communicate with those who are physically unable to do so any other way. JSL isn't stupid, it's important. Or at least... it's important to me that I learn it."

The girl blinked at him, then sighed. "I get that, Shuichi, I do. I'm sorry for thinking it was stupid, I just... never really thought about it the way you did," she mumbled, stroking one of her braids. "I guess I take my hearing for granted, as many of us do. But I don't know if I'm willing to take the time to learn it, I just don't have the energy."

Shuichi relaxed his shoulders. "Kaede and I talked about that, actually. We both agreed it would've been better if schools taught it from the start, or at least had an elective course in every school, but instead we've got to learn useless subjects like math."

Maki let out a rare half-laugh. "Math isn't useless, dummy," she spoke fondly.

"I will refute that until the day I die."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Btw Kokichi had his phone on vibrate since he can't hear a notification.
> 
> Also I might add chapters to this maybe... not sure yet. I gave myself a limit but I might need to stretch it. Sorry for the slowburn.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First date pt1 (✿´‿`) ♬

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to cut this into two because I don't know how to outline. This is just spewing out of me when I should be doing something productive but nope. :p

Shuichi was in a predicament. He had absolutely no idea what to wear.

Ergo, he was face timing Kaede, who, by the way, was not exactly being all that helpful.

"He's never seen you in anything but your uniform, whatever you wear will be fine," she spoke, munching on a box of pocky while she lounged on her bed in her pyjamas.

Shuichi groaned and ran a hand over his face. "Not helping," he commented.

She stuck her tongue out at him. Shuichi went over his options. Kaede wasn't lying when she said he hadn't outgrown his emo phase, he had a lot of black in his wardrobe. He decided to forgo anything with band symbols or anything that looked way too dramatic, even his Unus Annus stuff. He wasn't left with that much.

He pulled on a white shirt and black ripped jeans, slipped on a long black jacket over that plus black fingerless gloves. "Jewellery?" he asked Kaede.

She considered this for a second, then snapped her fingers. "Yes, do the o-ring choker, the one with the heart."

Shuichi weighed the options, then decided that was probably the safest bet and clipped it on. "Eyeliner?" he asked next.

"Yes, but don't overdo it," Kaede replied.

"Noted."

Shuichi took the phone into the bathroom with him and opened his small bottle of black eyeliner. Her carefully drew it on to the sounds of Kaede munching on chocolate-covered sticks and her music in the background. "Sweater Weather?" he asked, finished with one eye.

Kaede laughed. "As a fellow bisexual you should appreciate that," she noted.

Shuichi let out a little laugh of his own and shook his head. "I mean, I do... but can you put on Panic! at the Disco next?"

"Hell yeah!" Kaede replied, watching Shuichi do his other eye and fan himself to let it dry.

The familiar voice of Brandon Urie played from Shuichi's phone and he saw Kaede dancing in her room. Shuichi smiled and stepped back, looking at himself in the mirror. He looked presentable at the very least, and the Misaki theatre didn't require fancy attire anyway, so this was actually preferable. He only hoped Kokichi wouldn't judge him for his sense of style.

"You're gonna do great," Kaede assured him. "Just don't be weird."

Shuichi let out a sigh. "I still have thirty minutes before I have to leave. Do you mind if we practice sign for a bit? I just want to make sure I don't mess up or anything."

Kaede smiled and nodded. "Yeah, sure. I could use the practise anyway."

So that's what they did for the next half hour. Shuichi still wasn't completely confident in it but regardless he said goodbye to Kaede and slipped his phone into his pocket, running out before he missed the train.

"Where are you going now?" his uncle asked from the kitchen.

"Misaki theatre," Shuichi called, slipping on his black tennis shoes. "I'm going on a date."

"Oh, that's nice. With who?"

"Kokichi."

"Mm, okay. You have fun now."

Shuichi smiled. "Bye, Uncle!" he called before closing the door and bolting it down the stairs of their apartment, speed walking on the sidewalk to make it to the subway. He got there just in time and squeezed in, pulling up his phone as he sat down in one of the vacant seats.

**Me:**

I'm headed there now, should be at the theatre in around ten minutes.

**Kokichi:**

cool

im leaving my house now

see ya there

Shuichi smiled down at his phone. Maybe this really was a date. He really hoped it was.

Eventually, he got to his stop and rushed out. He had to physically stop himself from running all the way to the theatre. He arrived within a few minutes and stopped at the entrance. His phone dinged and he pulled it out.

**Kokichi:**

i see u :)

Shuichi looked up to see Kokichi waving at him. His heart melted on the spot. Kokichi had cleaned up a little bit, white jacket over a black shirt, white jeans, black converse, and a checkered bandana around his neck. Kokichi walked up to him. "It's good to see you!" he said.

Shuichi smiled. 'You look good' he signed.

Kokichi giggled and held his face in his hands. "Aw, you're making me blush, Shumai!"

Then he reached out and grabbed Shuichi's hand, leading him in. "Let's go!" he announced.

The show they were watching was a broadway kind of rendition of Peter Pan. Shuichi had to do the explaining that Kokichi was deaf and the ticket master immediately understood, giving them a seat with the translators. 

While they were walking to the theatre Kokichi practically shoved the ticket in Shuichi's face. "Keebo and this guy named Rantaro are gonna be our translators," he said.

'Do you know Rantaro?' Shuichi asked.

Kokichi shook his head. "Nah, but Keebo's mentioned him in passing, I think they're friends or something."

They made it safely into the theatre and Kokichi practically hopped down the stairs. "I'm excited! It's been a while since I've seen a real show!"

Shuichi smiled. 'I wanted to ask, do you want to get dinner after this? I will pay.' he signed.

Kokichi let out a small gasp. "Free food? Oh, but how could I refuse?" he said teasingly. "Yeah, I would love that, actually!"

'Where do you want to go?'

"Anywhere works for me, as long as they have a decent dessert menu I'm down to go anywhere."

Kokichi sat down on one of their assigned seats and crossed his legs. Shuichi sat down next to him. It didn't take very long for the theatre to fill up, and soon enough the lights turned down. Keebo and who Shuichi assumed was Rantaro came out. Keebo's eyes widened when they saw Kokichi and signed a hello. Kokichi responded with a smile. Rantaro and Keebo had a quick hand conversation before they stood in front of the small portion of the audience.

Shuchi knew there were at least one or two other deaf people in the audience with them, which is why Keebo and Rantaro went through the whole process of introducing themselves in sign before the show started. Rantaro had a habit of moving his mouth wordlessly as he signed, a habit Kaede did as well.

Soon enough the show started, Shuichi was mostly watching the actors on stage but he would occasionally glance over at the translators and Kokichi watching them. Both of them were really good at their job, and Shuichi had to give them props. They probably had to memorize the entire script then translate it into sign language, a feat he wasn't sure he'd be able to do himself.

The show was actually really good, and Shuichi knew it was targeted towards a younger audience, and he saw a lot of kids in the audience as well, he could even hear them whispering to their parents at times or shouting at the actors during certain scenes. Regardless, the entire performance was so expressive and interesting Shuichi kind of got lost in it.

He looked over at Kokichi during one of the last scenes and noticed something he hadn't before.

Kokichi's eyes were trained on the translators in front of him, but from this angle, Shuichi could see a healing bruise right under his jaw. It wasn't that visible, especially if he saw him from the front, but even in the dark, he could see it. Did he get in a fight? Did he fall or something? Shuichi decided not to pry for now and settled back into his seat and continued watching the show. He'd ask about it later.

There was a lot of applause at the end, and Kokichi literally stood up, mostly clapping for the two translators, Shuichi knew that much. When the lights turned back on Keebo signalled for the two of them to follow them. They led them to a room behind the stage to wear Rantaro was sitting at a small table in what looked like a break room.

"Rantaro, this is my friend Kokichi." Keebo introduced Kokichi to him. He then turned to Kokichi and signed something similar, fingerspelling Rantaro's name.

Kokichi smiled and held his hand out for Rantaro to shake. Rantaro smiled. 'It's nice to meet you.' he signed.

"Oh yeah totally! Keebo talks about you a lot!" Kokichi giggled.

Keebo then pointed to Shuichi. "And this is Shuichi, Kokichi's boyfriend."

Shuichi turned red and looked away. He knew Kokichi didn't hear him, but still... it was embarrassing.

"We're not dating..." he mumbled.

Rantaro laughed. "That's understandable. Did you guys like the show?" he signed it as well so Kokichi could understand.

Kokichi nodded vigorously. "Yeah yeah yeah! It was a lot of fun! It was kinda hard to keep up with you and what was going on stage though..."

'Yeah, we've found that's a bit of a problem sometimes especially with where you guys are located in the theatre. Sorry about that.'

Shuichi was in total awe, Rantaro's sign language seemed absolutely perfect. It was next to incredible.

He and Kokichi had a small conversation before they had to say goodbye and Kokichi returned to Shuichi's side. "Alright, where we going, Mister Buying Me Food."

Shuichi laughed and held out his hand for Kokichi to take. 'Surprise.' he signed.

Kokichi smirked and grabbed his hand. "Lead the way."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I had to I'm sad about them being over.
> 
> Also, their little trip to the theatre is actually based on a real experience I had. I noticed the translators when I went to the show myself and I couldn't take my eyes off of them. I think their job is so cool and they should get paid a lot more than they do. Translators work so hard and they are literally doing God's work for deaf people. Props to anyone who does that for a living. You have my respect.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First date pt2
> 
>  **Trigger Warning:** Mentions of Homophobic language and actions as well as ableist terms used. None of these are reflective of my own opinions towards the LGBTQ+ community and the disabled community.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry in advance.
> 
> Also double update because this had to come in two parts :)

Shuichi and Kokichi didn't talk much on the way there, that was fine, as long as Shuichi still felt Kokichi squeezing his hand he was content. They had to walk a bit and the sun was almost setting when they arrived. Kokichi looked up at the places. _"Hanamura's?"_ he asked.

Shuichi nodded. 'They have really good dessert.' he signed, fingerspelling the last word since he didn't know it.

Kokichi laughed. "Well, I'm sold. By the way, the sign for dessert is this," he made a hand motion and Shuichi repeated it. Another one to add to the list.

They walked inside and immediately were greeted by a waiter. "Hi, table for two?" he asked.

Shuichi nodded. "Yes please, oh, by the way, one of our party members is deaf, do you have any waiters that can sign? If not I can translate," he asked.

The waiter stared at Kokichi, who stared back, blissfully unaware of the situation. The waiter cleared his throat. "Uh, I believe so. I'll have to ask. Can I lead you to your seats in the meantime?"

"Yeah, that would be great, thank you."

The waiter led them to a booth a little ways away from everyone else. Kokichi leaned his elbows on the table and locked eyes with Shuichi. "What did you guys talk about? The waiter was looking at me kinda funny."

'Asking about a waiter that knows JSL.' Shuichi explained.

Kokichi nodded. "Okay, that makes sense..." he trailed off.

Shuichi stared at him for a bit, then waved to get his attention. 'Hey. I have question. Why do you speak?' he asked.

Kokichi slumped in his seat. "Well, the short answer is I lost my hearing when I was 13, so I can speak and it's easier for others that can hear if I do speak. I can sign just fine but doing both at once takes a lot of brainpower, so I just talk. Even though I can't hear myself."

'Do you remember..." Shuichi paused, then took a breath. 'Your voice?'

Kokichi let out a small smile. "Yeah, I do. It's the only voice I hear in my head. I have no idea if it dropped at all during puberty though, so I guess I'll never know."

At that point a young lady with grey hair covering one of her eyes came over and bowed, holding up gloved hands to sign. 'Hello, my name is Kirumi and I'll be your server for today!'

She was actually really nice and accommodating. Kokichi had a full conversation at one point with her, hands moving rapidly that made Shuichi's head spin. She came out with the food and drinks and honestly they were just as good as Shuichi remembered, god, he hadn't been here in a while. Kokichi seemed to be enjoying himself too, and when the dessert came out he was literally in awe.

"Look at the tiny little flowers made of chocolate!" he pointed out, acting like a child on Christmas. "Omigod they're so cute!"

Shuichi laughed, he had to agree, the attention to detail was impeccable. After everything was said and done and Shuichi paid for the food the two set out to head home, but Kokichi stopped him. "Here... I wanna show you one more thing, okay?"

So they walked some more, possibly even longer than to the restaurant from the theatre. Eventually, they came to a bridge, the sun was down now, and the could see the stars clearly from here. Kokichi leaned over the edge and looked down at the stream and the swimming koi fish. "I used to come here a lot when I was first in the hospital. When I lost my hearing my mom thought it was so sudden something was wrong. They tried everything but nothing, my ears were permanently damaged."

Shuichi leaned next to him, wanting to hear more of his story. "It's funny, though. I missed an entire half of a semester, and when I got back everyone felt bad for me." he let out a small laugh. "But then there were the people that just... wouldn't even bother trying. So I was kind of outcasted a lot. Not that I really minded, I couldn't hear the things they were saying about me anyway."

Shuichi tapped his shoulder to get his attention. 'So you are completely deaf?' the street lights gave off just enough light so Kokichi could see his hands.

Kokichi shook his head. "Like... I can hear basic sounds, but just barely, I can tell when an alarm is sounding if I'm standing next to it with my eyes closed, but it's like trying to hear through water," he said.

'Kokichi.'

"Yeah?"

Shuichi paused, hands going still. He swallowed. 'Is this a date?'

Kokichi looked at him. "Do you want it to be?"

Shuichi hesitated, before nodding. 'I really... want to be your boyfriend.'

Kokichi's eyes widened, but only a fraction. He smiled. "You're willing to be with someone like me, someone who could never hear your real voice?"

Shuichi nodded, more firm and determined this time. 'I know it would be a lot of work, but it would have been worth it.'

Kokichi's smile only grew. He stood on his toes in order to hold Shuichi's face in his hands. "Then, if we're dating that means I can kiss you, right?"

Shuichi felt his face heat up, but he nodded.

He closed his eyes when Kokichi leaned in and connected their lips. The feeling was ethereal, and Shuichi wanted to sink in it forever. Kokichi smiled as he kissed him, seemingly at peace with the world around them.

"I'm home," Kokichi called into the house, kicking off his shoes.

He heard glass shattering from the kitchen and he winced. God, he hated his hearing aids.

His mother came into view. "Why are you home so late?" she asked.

"I'm an adult, I'm allowed to do what I like," Kokichi replied, walking past her.

His mom looked behind her as Kokichi saw the mess in the kitchen. His mom had probably shattered her wine glass when she heard him. "You aren't supposed to be drinking," he said. "The agency said-"

"Oh, fuck the agency!" she shouted. "What are they going to do, kick me out? I'm the best goddamn model they got!"

Kokichi relaxed his shoulders. "Mom, you're drunk. Come on."

He reached out to her and she slapped his hand away. "You fucking little retard... you don't get it," she mumbled. "Were you on a date?"

Kokichi shook his head. "No, mom. I wasn't on a date." he lied. "Now, please let me help you. You're so loud."

"Then just... take off the aids..." she mumbled, sinking to the floor with the wall as her only support.

Kokichi reached down, and this time his mom didn't push him away. He helped her stand up and sit on one of the chairs, taking her heels off before taking her to her bedroom and letting her collapse on her bed. Kokichi didn't actually mind when she was drunk, at least she wasn't yelling at him, but the problem came from what would happen to her job if she kept at it.

He walked into the kitchen and started cleaning up the mess his mom had made. By the time he was done, he turned around and saw her standing in the doorway. "Mom, please go back to bed." he pleaded.

"Kokichi, answer me truthfully. Were you on a date?"

That's right, his mom was just as much of a liar as he was. And she could see his facades better than anyone. He looked away from her. "Yeah, and what of it?"

"Was it with a boy?"

Quiet. "Kokichi!" his mom yelled. "Answer me goddammit!"

"Yeah..." Kokichi murmured. "Yeah, it was with a boy. Am I ruining your perfect ideology of masculinity? Guess what, I not going to be your perfect child! That was thrown out the window the second I lost my hearing!"

He was yelling, why was he yelling? He hated the sound of his voice, so why was he yelling? His mom gave him a look, then promptly collapsed. Kokichi breathed a loud sigh of relief. Thank god, she wouldn't remember this in the morning. Kokichi considered just leaving her there but decided he couldn't if he wanted to keep on this mask. So he picked her up and once again practically carried her to her room.

Once he was done with that he went to his own room and tore out his hearing aids, slamming them in the little black box he carried around to keep them in. He wanted to throw them in the trash but his mom refused to learn sign for him and she would just yell at him some more once they got new ones.

So he just sat on his bed and cried. God, what he wouldn't give to just at least have his dad back. But you can't bring back someone who's dead. He wanted to call Keebo, talk to them, but he knew they probably were asleep by now, and bothering them with something like this would break the carefully crafted mask he worked so hard to keep up.

Then he felt the vibrations in his phone. He picked it up and stared at it, blurry-eyed.

**Shumai:**

I had a lot of fun today. I'll see you tomorrow? <3

Kokichi smiled to himself. He really did love Shuichi a lot, he really seemed to care about him. He had opened up to Shuichi, and he accepted him no matter what. That kind of person you don't find just anywhere.

**Me:**

i did 2

yea ill cya tmrw

luv u <3

**Shumai:**

I love you too, goodnight, Kokichi

**Me:**

night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long story short: Kokichi's dad died and that set something off in his mom causing her to go slightly nuts which only got worse when he lost his hearing, she also has a very clear idea of masculinity and femininity which any time Kokichi doesn't follow those rules she yells at him, so he's developed a trigger for loud voices, hence he doesn't use his hearing aids very often in public.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> heartstrings... ripped

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi i'm sorry for updating a lot and everyday but I just have the biggest inspiration boost for this fic alone so I'm sorry but you're just gonna have to bear with me on this one thanks

Three weeks later and Kokichi and Shuichi were still together. Shuichi's sign language had improved significantly, with Kokichi helping him of course. Most days they spent Shuichi's break together at the coffee shop, conversing and generally just being around each other. Kaede would often tease him about their relationship, Maki mostly didn't mention it.

Then one day Kokichi didn't come at the normal time. But Shuichi got a notification on his phone.

**Kokichi <3:**

meet me on the bridge when u get off

i hav surprise 4 u

bring my drink pwease :)

Shuichi smiled down at his phone, typing out an affirmative and pocketing his phone. He would get off in about an hour, so he would head out then. It was just him and Kaede that day, and no one had really come in anyways, so they were just messing around.

Near the end of the day, Shuichi asked Kaede to make the drinks and she quickly whipped them up, but when Shuichi pulled out his wallet she stopped him. "I'll put these on the house, you go have fun."

"Really? Are you sure?" he asked.

Kaede nodded and handed him the drinks. Shuichi smiled. "Thank you!" he said, running out of the door.

It was a bit of a walk to the bridge, but soon enough Shuichi could see his boyfriend in sight. He nearly ran towards him but someone from behind him called his name. He turned around to see Kaito and Maki standing behind him, Kaito waving dramatically. Shuichi smiled at them and tried to wave back. "Hi..." he said. "Funny seeing you two here."

Kaito ran up to him. "Hey man, how ya been?" he asked, excited.

"I'm good, I just got off of work. How are you?" Shuichi replied.

Maki came up next to Kaito. "Are you on a date?" she asked, pointing at the two drinks in his hand.

Shuichi nodded. "Yeah, Kokichi's on the bridge over there, I can introduce you if-"

"HEY KOKICHI!" Kaito yelled, making Shuichi winced.

Maki rolled her eyes. Kokichi didn't respond, obviously. Kaito scoffed. "Is he ignoring me?" he asked, offended.

"No, he just can't-" Shuichi tried.

Too late, Kaito was already making a beeline for Kokichi. Both Maki and Shuichi let out exasperated sighs before following him. Kaito came up behind Kokichi and tapped him on the shoulder, startling him. "Hey there! You're Kokichi, right? My name's Kaito Momota and I'm Shuichi's friend! It's nice to meet you!"

Kokichi just gave him a blank stare. Shuichi ran up quickly. Kokichi locked eyes with him and quickly signed something to him. 'Is he stupid?'

Shuichi nodded. 'Unfortunately...' he replied.

Kokichi laughed loudly. "Oh man, you're hilarious. Sorry, I can't hear you," he said.

Kaito only got more confused. "Wait, huh?"

Shuichi handed Kokichi his drink. "Kaito, Kokichi's deaf."

That only succeeded in confusing the man even more. "But he can talk just fine, you sure he's not just faking it?"

Shuichi facepalmed. Kokichi, having no idea what he just said, just stood there innocently. "He's not faking it, trust me. But he lost his hearing when he was younger, he wasn't born deaf. He can still talk just fine."

The two launched into an intense conversation while Shuichi tried to explain everything to Kaito, Kokichi just stood there rocking back and forth. Then Maki tapped him on the shoulder. He looked over at her and she handed him a folded piece of paper.

"I've been meaning to give this to you for a while," she said. "Right, sorry, you can't hear me."

Kokichi took the paper and unfolded it. What he saw nearly made him drop it.

_I don't think you realize what Shuichi's doing for you here. Dating you is taking a lot of his time and energy, especially with learning how to sign. If you aren't grateful for him then I will come for you._

He swallowed. "I am grateful, I love him a lot. Isn't that obvious?" he spoke. "It's not exactly my fault I'm hard to be with, I'm trying my hardest to make this easiest for him."

Maki pointed to the next section of the paper.

_Why can't you get hearing aids? Is it a monetary thing? If you could then that would make things a lot easier._

Kokichi tensed. Hearing aids... the black box in his pocket felt heavy. He felt his hands shaking, breathing pick up. He didn't want to hear, didn't want to hear people yelling at him. So he just shook his head.

"I... I can't get hearing aids. They wouldn't help in my case."

Shuichi seemed to sense his distress and came over. 'Is everything okay?' he signed.

Kokichi crumbled the paper in his hand and put on a smile. "I'm fine!" he replied, shoving the paper into his pocket and signing the words coming out of his mouth. "Come on, I still have a surprise for you!"

So he grabbed Shuichi's hand and dragged him away from the other couple, heading pounding in his skull, but his face didn't show any sort of pain.

'An amusement park?' Shuichi asked as they came to the entrance.

Kokichi nodded. "Yeah! I've wanted to go here for a while now! That okay?"

Shuichi smiled. 'I have not been to one of these in a long time.' he admitted.

"Well, then we absolutely have to go. Come on!" he practically dragged Shuichi inside the park.

The two walked around for a bit, they got food first because Shuichi hadn't eaten all day and Kokichi joked about being able to hear his stomach growl since it was so loud. Shuichi facepalmed. 'Kokichi... you're deaf...' he reminded him.

"Yes, and? Your stomach is just that loud."

Shuichi let out a little chuckle. 'Fine, then choose a place to eat.'

Kokichi pointed to a stall and started walking towards it, Shuichi in tow. Apparently, Kokichi had a knack for knowing where to get good food, because it was actually fairly decent for fair food.

Shuichi had completely finished his (Kokichi was right, he had been starving) and Kokichi was nearly down with his when the smaller stopped in his tracks, staring up at the Ferris wheel. He looked at Shuichi expectantly, who signed to him, 'You want to go up there?'

Kokichi nodded, quickly gulping down the rest of his food and running to the line, Shuichi following him. Kokichi was practically hopping up and down, a little surprising considering it wasn't that exciting of a ride. Soon enough it was there turn, the ticket master took their tickets and let them into a booth, closing the door. It was one of those wheels with the completely closed cars, with windows looking out onto the entire park. Kokichi stared out the windows in awe, pressing his cheek against the glass.

Shuichi smiled, waving his hand to get Kokichi's attention. 'Are you having fun?' he asked.

"Yes, of course, I am! I'm at a fair with my wonderful boyfriend, how could I not be having fun?"

Shuichi felt himself get flustered over that. Kokichi laughed. "Jeez, you're still so predictable!" he spoke, leaning over in his seat. "But I still love you!"

Shuichi smiled. 'I love you too.' he replied. 'I wish you could hear me say it."

Kokichi face kind of fell. "Hey, Shuichi?" he asked. "Do you think me being deaf is a bad thing? Do you think is a problem in our relationship?"

Where did that come from? Shuichi thought for a moment, then signed, 'No'. Clearly, that wasn't enough to convince him. Shuichi cleared his throat. 'The only problem is the fact that you think it's a problem.'

No response. Shuichi stood up and walked over, crouching down slightly and grabbing onto Kokichi's hand. Wordless conversation floated through the two, and eventually, Kokichi let out a sigh of relief. "I really do love you, you know that, right?"

Shuichi smiled, reaching up with his free hand and holding Kokichi's face, then leaning forward to kiss him gently. Yes, he knew it was cheesy, to kiss his boyfriend in a Ferris wheel at an amusement park, but it was more than that for them. It was reassurance that no matter what obstacles came in the way of them, Shuichi would find a way to make their relationship. That much he promised himself.

Kokichi moved so their positions changed, Shuichi sitting down with Kokichi in his lap. Shuichi wrapped his arms around his boyfriend while the other sank his fingers into his hair, slotting their lips together just perfectly. If he had a choice, Shuichi would stay here forever.

But soon enough he realized they were going back down and he separated from Kokichi. 'Later' he promised. 'We have to go now.'

Kokichi whined in protest. "Aw, man. I wanted to kiss you more."

Shuichi slipped him off his lap just as the door opened. Shuichi grabbed Kokichi's hand and led him out, smiling to himself as he did so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maki isn't being a bitch okay! I love her too much for that.
> 
> Listen, she's looking out for what's best for her friend, and she doesn't want to see Shuichi stressed over a relationship so she's trying to look out for him, she's not trying to be ableist and she doesn't know that Kokichi has a problem with his hearing aids.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is where the angst starts
> 
>  **Trigger Warning:** Mentions of suicide and suicidal actions. Please do not read if uncomfortable with such topics.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This turned very quickly into a Danganronpa version of A Silent Voice I'm sorry.
> 
> This chapter will be the last similarity.

Festival season. The week where everyone was excited about going to their local neighbourhood and gorge themselves on candy apples and yakisoba, doing mindless fair games and watching the fireworks, wearing colourful outfits and generally having a good time.

Shuichi used to go to them with his uncle, but this year he'd be going with his friends. Kaito, Maki, and Kaede, and Kokichi had confirmed he'd be there with Keebo and their girlfriend. So that was something to look forward to. 

The night before Shuichi was supposed to go to the festival, he tapped his pencil on his desk, staring off into space. Normally he'd use this kind of free time to cram in some JSL practice, but tonight he felt kind of numb. He closed his eyes and leaned back in his chair.

Nothing had changed, or so he thought. After the fair incident, Kokichi seemed back to his normal peppy self, which was good, but Shuichi had this nagging feeling at the back of his mind telling him something was wrong, but he just couldn't put his finger on it. It drove him nuts. He really should just talk to Kokichi but he wasn't entirely sure what to say.

He might regret this later but he decided to hold off for now.

His phone beeped and he picked it up.

**Maki:**

is your boyfriend coming with us to the festival?

**Me:**

Yes. Is that okay? He's bringing some of his friends as well.

**Maki:**

that's fine

you'll have to translate for him though

is that going to be too hard for you?

**Me:**

It'll be fine. I've been doing it for months anyway. Besides, Kokichi doesn't always want to know

what's going on 24/7 with everyone, especially when multiple people are talking. I'm sure it'll be

fine.

**Maki:**

i will hold you to that

**Me:**

Wouldn't expect anything less.

He received a different text, this time from Kaede.

**Kaede:**

Hey hey! How many ppl r gonna be at the festival tomorrow? 💕

**Me:**

You, me, Maki, Kaito, Kokichi, Keebo, and their girlfriend. So seven in our group.

**Kaede:**

Awesome! I can't wait to see everyone! 🐱 👍

Let's hope I can keep up w/ u and Kokichi in sign haha 😅

**Me:**

I'm sure you'll do fine. I'll see you tomorrow then.

**Kaede:**

Yup, cya! 👋

Shuichi stared at his phone, his battery was about to die. He'd have to plug it in for the night if he wanted it charged by tomorrow. He didn't have work and the festival started at seven, so he would have some downtime beforehand. He'd have to figure out what he wanted to do with that time. He could practice his sign, or he could meet up with Kokichi and be together with him for a bit.

His phone set off another notification.

**Kokichi:**

cya tmrrw, baby :)

i cant wait to kiss u when i see u

mwuah <3

Shuichi smiled, he was in the middle of typing a response when his phone went dark. Dammit. Well, he supposed it was fine. He would text him in the morning, and he would see him tomorrow anyway.

It was probably fine.

Shuichi woke up late, slept right through his alarm. When he woke up it was because Kaede had called him a thousand and a half times telling him to wake up because she had something special to take him too. So he basically rushed getting ready and ran down the stairs, meeting Kaede at the front of his apartment building with Maki.

"We're gonna go pick out kimonos and you're going to help us!" Kaede announced.

Shuichi laughed. "Do I have a choice in this?" he asked.

"Nope!" Kaede replied, popping the 'p' dramatically. "Maki didn't want to come either, but I promised to buy food for her afterwards!"

Maki crossed her arms and rolled her eyes, but she was smiling. Kaede led them to a shop that sold kimonos and tried on like 100 before settling on a white one with pink flowers and little gold music notes. Maki found a dark red one with a black sash and bought that one immediately. All of them then congregated at Kaede's house so Shuichi could do their hair.

Contrary to popular belief, Shuichi was actually incredible with hair, and within thirty minutes he had done both of their hair up in gorgeous buns, each secured with a pin and little clips that he found in Kaede's little jewellery box. Kaede was in total awe at Shuichi's ability and even Maki looked impressed.

Last stop before the festival was to get food at a local restaurant. Kaede brought them into a cute little food place with a patio and they all ate there. Shuichi had to admit, this place had pretty good Italian food, and he made a mental note to take Kokichi here one day if he had the chance.

Soon enough the sun hung low in the sky and Kaede checked her phone. "Oh, shit, we gotta go otherwise we won't make it in time," she noted.

They paid for the food and left soon enough, stopping at Maki's house since it was close by to change into their outfits. They both looked beautiful by the time everything was said and done.

Walking to the festival proved not to be that big of a struggle and they arrived before sundown, seeing Kaito waiting for them at the entrance. He greeted them with a smile and quickly pulled Maki into a kiss. "Glad you guys could make it. Kaede, Maki, looking beautiful as always." he complimented both of them, but he was looking at Maki when he said it.

"We're just waiting on Shuichi's boyfriend and company," Kaede said.

Shuichi nodded. "Kokichi texted me and informed me they should be here soon."

Kaito narrowed his eyes. "Is Kokichi the deaf kid?" he asked.

"Yeah, that's him," Kaede confirmed.

Kaito groaned loudly. "Why is he coming? He can't even hear the fireworks or our conversation!"

Maki slapped him on the shoulder. "Just because he's deaf doesn't mean he's stupid! Shuichi and Kaede both know sign language, remember? He'll be perfectly fine with us."

Shuichi let out a sigh of relief. "I'm glad you're warming up to him," he said.

Maki shrugged and said nothing else.

Right on cue Shuichi looked over and saw Keebo waving to them, a girl with long blonde hair who was significantly taller than them attached to their arm. "Hello everyone!" Keebo said. "Sorry, we're a little late."

Shuichi lifted his hand in a wave, but he was confused. "Um, where's Kokichi?" he asked.

Keebo relaxed their shoulders. "Uh, yeah, he's not coming," they said. "He got sick, or at least that's what he told me. He said he might come later but we're not sure about that."

Kaede gasped. "Oh no, is he going to be okay?" she asked.

Keebo's girlfriend laughed out loud. "You kidding? It'll take more than a stomach bug to knock down our Kokichi!" she said, voice loud and haughty.

Keebo laughed along with her. "Right, I forgot to introduce you all. This is my girlfriend, Miu Iruma."

Miu waved to them all with a smile. "Nice to meet ya!"

Shuichi had an uneasy feeling in the back of his mind, but he ignored it. They went through the festival like normal, but since Shuichi was off-put, after almost an hour he excused himself, saying he wasn't feeling well and was overwhelmed by the large crowds, and left. 

Walking back seemed so strange, and lonely. He was really looking forward to seeing Kokichi at the festival, and now he wouldn't get the chance to. That really sucked.

He kicked a nearby rock on the street. Maybe he should pop by Kokichi's house to make sure he was okay? Would that be rude? He wasn't sure.

Shuichi looked up since he had to cross the street to the other side, to where the cliffs were.

"Kokichi?"

Indeed, his boyfriend was standing there, leaning on the edge of the railings, staring up at the stars in the sky.

At that moment a firework went off, right in front of him. Shuichi seemed confused at first, what was he doing here? He thought he was sick?

Then Kokichi climbed up on the railing.

Shuichi gasped and ran forward, tripping on the road, calling out. "KOKICHI WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

He couldn't hear him, of course he couldn't hear him. Kokichi stood on the railing, holding the top bar while he stood on the bottom one, staring down at the rocks and water

Shuichi felt his heart pound in his chest, he scrambled up and ran to Kokichi. "No no no no no no no no no no NO!" he shouted, running forward as fast as he could, breathing picking up.

Everything else just completely evaporated, Shuichi was thrown into a state of panic, terrified of what Kokichi would do. He reached out to him just as Kokichi's hands left the railing.

"KOKICHI DON'T!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's only going to go downhill from here.
> 
> I am so sorry.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> OKAY I CRIED WHEN MAKING THIS CHAPTER I'M SORRY.
> 
>  **Trigger Warning:** Mentions of attempted Suicide and an emotionally abusive family life. Please do not read if you are uncomfortable with such topics. 
> 
> I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable :(

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize in advance if this pulls at your heartstrings... that's what I was going for.
> 
> In all honestly, though I usually hate using suicide in my fics as an angst factor because often I don't think that I can portray it well. I've never been in this situation so I would have no idea how to write it.
> 
> Regardless though, I do hope you enjoy, and I'm sorry for saying this, but I hope you can get a good cry out of it. I know that it's good for the human body to get out some emotions every once in a while, so enjoy :)

Shuichi was hyperventilating, he knew that.

But he didn't care. The only thing that mattered was Kokichi's wrist caught in his hand and his boyfriend staring up at him with confused eyes. Shuichi was sweating, mixed with scared tears.

"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry Kokichi... I'm sorry I'm sorry..." he kept wheezing.

He didn't know why he was apologizing. Everything was happening so fast but also in slow motion. Shuichi wasn't that strong of a person, and he was relying on his firmly planted feet and his body pressed against the railing to keep him grounded. He swallowed thickly and reached out his other hand. "Kokichi... please... give me your other hand."

He knew Kokichi couldn't hear him, but he had to know, he had to understand.

To his immense relief he did, and Kokichi grabbed his other hand and Shuichi used every ounce of strength he had left in him to pull him up, finally getting Kokichi to cooperate and catch his feet on the ledge and lift himself up. Shuichi got him over the railing and back onto the solid ground and pulled him into a hug, both of them falling backwards. Shuichi was crying, bawling even. He couldn't formulate words, not that it would matter anyway, but he just wanted to hold Kokichi close to him and not let go.

He felt Kokichi wrap his arms around him, and then felt a hitch in his breath. He stopped, hearing the sounds of Kokichi sobbing against his shoulder. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry Shuichi..." Kokichi spoke. 

Shuichi hugged him tightly, just to let him know he was there. They sat there for what seemed like hours until Shuichi had calmed down enough. Kokichi was still crying, and Shuichi hated seeing him cry. He separated just enough so Shuichi could sign. 'You scared me.'

Kokichi hung his head. "I'm sorry... Shuichi I can't... I can't..." he hiccuped.

Shuichi tapped him. 'You don't have to tell me.' he signed. 'Do you want to go back to my house?'

Kokichi nodded. Shuichi helped him to his feet and held onto him from the waist as they walked to the subway station. It was completely quiet all the way to Shuichi's house. He opened the door to see his Uncle sitting at the table. "Ah, good evening Shuichi, you're back early," he noted.

"We ran into a problem," Shuichi explained. "Is it okay if Kokichi stays here for the night?"

His uncle saw the scene before him, and it was as if he immediately understood. "Yes, of course. You two go up to your room, I'll be down here if you need anything."

"Thank you, Uncle."

So Shuichi helped Kokichi up to his room and sat him down on the bed. He stood up in front of him and looked around, he didn't want to leave him alone but he also thought he needed some things. Kokichi grabbed one of the blankets folded over the side of Shuichi's bed and wrapped it around himself, his eyes were red but his tears had dried.

Shuichi eventually just texted his Uncle to bring them up some hot chocolate or coffee or something, which was responded with an 'okay'.

He looked at Kokichi, who was staring up at him. 'Do you want to talk about it?' he asked.

Kokichi was silent, then he reached into his pocket and pulled out a black box, opening it to reveal two small devices.

Hearing aids.

Shuichi was stunned, to say the least. Was... was this the reason why Kokichi wanted to jump off the cliff? 'Why?' he signed.

"I've had these for a while," Kokichi explained. "Before you and I even met. I hate them so much. My mom won't learn sign so she just expects me to always have them in so she can talk to me, but all she does it yell. She's so loud..."

Kokichi's breathed stuttered, and he took a second to compose himself. "I lied. I know what my voice sounds like. I hate it." he went on. "Your friend, Maki was it? She told me it would be easier for you if I had hearing aids so you didn't have to give up your life to learn sign for me."

'That's not true!'

"Shuichi." Kokichi interrupted, putting his hand on top of Shuichi's. "It's fine. That's been a part of my life for as long as I could remember. No one wants to adjust to me so I have to adjust to everyone else. Everyone is so selfish..."

He leaned back, staring down at the contents of the box. "So I figured it would be better for everyone if I just stopped existing. It would be easier for my mom, who wouldn't have to take care of a broken child anymore, it would be easier for you, who wouldn't have to learn sign for me, easier for Keebo, who wouldn't have such a shitty friend, easier for everyone."

Shuichi had heard enough. He reached forward and covered Kokichi's ears with his hands. Kokichi blinked, confused. Shuichi swallowed hard, forcing down tears before he reached up shaky hands.

'You are not a burden. Kokichi, you are the funniest, sweetest, loveliest person I know. I love you so much and would never want you to kill yourself.' he started, not being able to stop the tears through his smile. 'So please... stay alive for me, okay?'

Kokichi was completely silent, as though he couldn't believe the words Shuichi was telling him. Shuichi smiled and pointed to the earbuds. 'Please understand that you can say no, but can you put those in for a second? I want to tell you something.'

Kokichi looked down at the aids before taking them out and putting him in with shaky hands. Once he was finished Shuichi pulled him into a tight hug, surprising the other.

"I love you," he spoke, voice barely a whisper.

Kokichi started straight up sobbing again. Shuichi just held him close and waited for him to calm down, once Kokichi's hiccuping sobs died down to steady breathing Shuichi separated enough from him to look at him, gently reaching up and taking the hearing aids out, putting them back in the box.

'You do not owe anyone anything.' he signed. 'You are not broken, and I love you all the same.'

Kokichi's shoulders relaxed as he reached up and wiped his teary eyes. "Th-Thank you..." he replied.

The rest of the night was dedicated to cuddles and watching movies with subtitles on. Neither of them got very much sleep but Shuichi woke up to his phone blowing up but Kokichi's arms wrapped around him, snoring lightly. Shuichi almost didn't want to get up but the phone ringing was getting kind of annoying so he rolled over and checked his phone.

He answered the call from Kaede and winced when she started yelling at him.

"WHAT THE HELL SHUICHI WHAT HAPPENED?!" she practically screamed. "YOU COMPLETELY DISAPPEARED AND WE COULDN'T FIND YOU AND THEN KOKICHI'S MOM CALLED US AND TOLD US HE WAS MISSING PLEASE TELL ME HE'S WITH YOU."

"Calm down, Kaede. Kokichi's fine. He's here with me." Shuichi replied. "We had kind of a rough night but everything's fine."

Silence. "Please tell me a 'rough night' doesn't mean what I think it means," Kaede replied.

Shuichi felt himself die from the amount of blushing he just did. "No, not like that. God, Kaede..." he mumbled.

"Well, are you two okay at least?"

"Yes, we're fine."

"Can we come over later? We can all have a chill hang out."

Shuichi smiled. "Yeah, I'm sure that would be okay."

"Oh, by the way, Keebo and Maki had a kind of heart to heart at the festival, I'm not sure what exactly they talked about, but Kaito nearly ripped their head off for talking to his girlfriend. Miu was dying laughing the entire time though."

"What's going on?" Kokichi asked, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. "Is everything good?"

Shuichi nodded, quickly signing, 'Talking to Kaede. Give me a minute, okay?'

Kokichi yawned and stretched. "Kay kay."

Shuichi stood up and walked over to his closet, opening it and sifting through his clothes to find something for him and Kokichi to wear. "That's interesting, I didn't expect them to get along at all really."

"Yeah, well, surprises can happen."

"What time are you guys coming over?"

"Hmmm, maybe in an hour or so, that still okay?"

"Yeah, should be fine. See you then."

"See you."

Shuichi hung up and tossed a dark blue hoodie and black jegging to Kokichi, who started changing immediately. Shuichi looked away respectively and started changing himself into an MCR t-shirt and black sweat pants. He turned around to see Kokichi unabashedly staring at him, Shuichi's clothes hanging loose on him. 'Like what you see?' he signed.

Kokichi giggled. "Oh, yes, very much so," he replied.

Shuichi died blushing for the second time that day.

An hour later everyone showed up at his door and Shuichi let them all in, already having his room set up for multiple people. Maki for some reason would look Kokichi in the eye but Kaito was as friendly as ever, asking Kaede or Shuichi to translate himself to Kokichi at almost every chance. Kokichi seemed incredibly happy to get a chance to talk to everyone. Miu fell asleep on Keebo at one point when they were all watching the movie, and Kaede had conked out on Shuichi's bed. Kaito was still watching, providing unnecessary commentary every couple of minutes.

Then something weird happened. Maki tapped Kokichi on the shoulder and motioned for him to follow her. Curious as Shuichi was, he followed them. They walked down the stairs, Maki having a notebook in her hands, and with where Shuichi was perched he could see it clearly.

 _I'm sorry_ was the first thing on there.

"For what?" Kokichi asked.

Maki wrote something down. _For being the way I was towards you. I talked to Keebo and they let me know some of the things they've been through._

Kokichi laughed. "Hey, it's fine. You were kinda right anyways, no hard feelings, honestly. I just want Shuichi to be happy."

_This isn't about Shuichi, it's about you._

That seemed to startle Kokichi as if him being in the center of attention because of his hearing was something he wasn't used to. "Run that by me again?"

Maki sighed dramatically and furiously wrote down something and practically shoved the notebook back into Kokichi's hands.

 _You're deaf and I didn't understand how that impacted you. I didn't understand that being with someone who was hearing would be difficult for you too. For that I'm sorry. I was trying to protect Shuichi but he never needed protecting. You're not doing anything wrong and you never did, at least nothing connected to your disability_.

Kokichi looked like he wanted to cry. "Aw, looks like you're going soft, Maki," he joked. "I thought you were so tough and stubborn."

Maki's expression softened as she wrote her next sentence down.

_I may be stubborn, but I can at least admit when I'm in the wrong._

Shuichi felt tears fall down his face. She had absolutely no idea that Kokichi was ready to end it all last night, and from their conversation, she may have unconsciously contributed to it, but now she realized her mistake and was apologizing for it. 

He walked back to the room to see Kaede awake and was intensely listening to Kaito go on a rant about an inaccuracy in the movie. He sat down next to her, and eventually, Maki and Kokichi came in.

"Hey," Maki whispered to Shuichi before she sat down next to them. "I think I'm ready to learn sign language."

Shuichi smiled at her. "Really?" he whispered back.

Maki nodded. "Really," she replied, a ghost of a smile crossing her lips. "I think I finally get it now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all were complaining about Maki before so here, take her character development you frickin fricks


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I really want people to get better. I promised angst was over and for the most part it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey so originally I was planning for this to be super sweet and fluffy but like because I'm me I was wondering if you guys would mind if for the last chapter there would be a bit of smut (after a shortish time skip of course).
> 
> If not that's fine but in my opinion it would be a good way to symbolize their comfort in their relationship and how much they really trust each other, but if people don't want to read that (and I'd have to change the rating at the last second) then that's okay I don't have to go down that route.
> 
> I'm not exactly an expert on how deaf people have sex with a hearing partner, I would assume it's the same just more touch reliant and less sound oriented.

"Yeah, I can't do this," Kokichi said, immediately turning around. 

Shuichi grabbed his hand and squeezed it. Kokichi looked back at him, taking a deep breath. "She's... going to be mad at me." he tried to reason. "And it's going to be hard for her to adjust anyways, it always has been."

'You are her son and she loves you. She'll adjust.' Shuichi signed.

Kokichi swallowed hard. "You know you don't have to keep signing, right? I put my hearing aids in."

'I have nothing more to say to you that you haven't already heard.'

Kokichi let out a little laugh. "I guess you're right," he mumbled. "Okay let's do this."

Shuichi smiled and walked Kokichi up to the house and knocked on the door. The person who answered surprisingly did look a lot like Kokichi, short with dark hair pulled up into a neat bun, skin pale and glittering, accenting pretty purple eyes. She was probably the embodiment of beauty, as if her picture would show up under the dictionary definition for 'goddess'.

"Kokichi? Where have you been? You didn't come home last night." she asked, voice already rising.

Kokichi stood his ground though, Shuichi told him he shouldn't be afraid to be himself around his mother, and it seemed as though he took those words to heart. "I... jumped off a cliff," he said. "Shuichi caught me and took me back to his house and I spent the night."

"What do you mean you-?!"

Shuichi covered Kokichi's ears with his hands. It was selfish of him for doing this, but he didn't want Kokichi to hear anything but his loving words ever again.

"Ms Ouma." he started, voice steady. "My name is Shuichi Saihara, and I'm Kokichi's boyfriend."

She froze, entire body tensing, eyes sharp and cold. Kokichi covered Shuichi's hands with his own and closed his eyes, probably enjoying the silence. Shuichi continued. "Last night I found him about to jump off the cliffs near the festival. Luckily I was able to catch him in time. But he later told me you were part of the reason that he chose to try and end his life."

Kokichi's mom's shoulders completely relaxed, and she stared at Shuichi with an almost dead look. "What... what are you talking about? Kokichi would never do something like that! I give him the perfect life there's no reason why-!"

Kokichi winced and Shuichi pressed his hands harder against his head, careful not to hurt him. "Ms Ouma, if you will please lower your voice." Shuichi requested.

She stopped, going silent. Shuichi took a deep breath. "Kokichi... I'm not entirely sure how to explain this... but he doesn't wear his hearing aids in public. He's heard my voice exactly once, and that was to tell him I love him." he swallowed thickly. "Ma'am, if you will, can you please tell me the last time you told your son you loved him?"

Kokichi opened his eyes, not that he heard anything, but it was the way that his mom went completely quiet that confused him. She said nothing for a long time, then looked down, biting her lip. "I... I can't remember... I never thought... he deserved it..."

She reached up to wipe at her eyes, leaking tears. "He's never... fit into my little box I wanted him to fit in..." she spoke, voice probably the quietest it's ever been.

Kokichi removed Shuichi's hands from his ears and walked up to his mom. "Hey," he said. "I'm sorry for not fitting into your norms, but it's been hard to do that when I know that I'm never going to, especially ever since I lost my hearing."

She looked up at him, mascara miraculously not running down her face. Kokichi smiled. "I'm still willing to forgive you, but if you don't mind, can I ditch the hearing aids, please? I don't need them, I want the world around me to be silent."

His mom hiccuped, covering her mouth to hide her sobbing. "But why? Why do you want to block everyone out?" she asked, voice muffled.

"I'm not blocking anyone out, especially not you. I'm just hoping you can change, adapt to fit me. I know that's a pretty big ask but-"

He was rendered silent as his mom pulled him for a surprise hug, holding him close as they both dropped to their knees. "I'm so sorry. I didn't realize I was hurting you." she sobbed. "I've just been so broken... none of it was ever your fault."

Kokichi hugged her back, burying his face into her shoulder. "Thank you," he whispered.

His mom separated from him to sign to him. 'I am sorry, I will try to be better.'

"You know-?"

"JSL? Yes, I have for a while. But... I guess I never really... thought to use it. I never asked what would be better for you. I'm sorry again, Kokichi."

She reached up to rub his head gently. "And... I know it will take me a bit to adjust to... all of this. I just hope you'll be patient with me."

Kokichi smiled. "Yeah! Of course!"

Shuichi smiled to himself. He knew it took time and dedication to fix a broken relationship, even one such as mother and son. He never got that, so he was only glad that his boyfriend was able to achieve something he'd give anything to have again.

Huh, was he crying? Must've been the cute scene in front of him. Yeah, that had to be it.

"Three... two... one..."

Kokichi closed his eyes as he threw the little black box that contained his hearing aids into the river. Shuichi and Keebo clapped for him. Kokichi took a deep breath before opening one eye to see them truly gone. Then he exhaled. "Oh my god... they're actually gone..." he spoke to himself. "I feel so... free."

'As you should.' Keebo signed to him. 'You did great.'

Kokichi signed a thank you and Shuichi wrapped him in a hug. Kokichi smiled and hugged him back. "But now I'll never get to hear your beautiful voice again." he pouted.

'You already heard all you needed to hear from me.' Shuichi signed quickly and kissed Kokichi on the cheek.

Kokichi laughed. "Yeah, I guess you're right," he replied. "You guys wanna go get coffee? On me."

'Hell yes!' Keebo signed, already heading in the direction of the nearest Starbucks.

Shuichi laughed and moved to follow them, Kokichi right behind him. "By the way, I've been meaning to ask, with the thing with me and my mom, I'm sorry. That was suuuuuper embarrassing and you were probably really awkward weren't ya?" he said, leaning down and looking up at Shuichi.

The other shook his head. 'It was actually really sweet to see you two be like that. Is she getting better?' he asked.

Kokichi nodded, straightening up and putting his hands behind his head. "Yeah, a bit. She hasn't been yelling as much and has mostly been communicating through JSL now, which is good. I guess before she needed something to get her frustration out, and I was the closest thing for her to do so. I've forgiven her though, so it's all good now."

'That is good to hear.'

Kokichi side-eyed Shuichi, frowning. "By the way, you don't have to tell me, but why do you live with your Uncle again? I don't think you've told me."

Shuichi clenched his fists, it was autumn already, and the weather was cold, but he felt as though the temperature had just dropped twenty degrees. He sighed and started carefully signing out his response. 'My parents died when I was young and I was raised by my Uncle, a really nice man who always was smiling. I do not really remember much of my parents but I do know that I miss them a lot, and would give anything to hug them again.'

Kokichi was silent for a second, before breaking into a soft smile. "I get that. I think I'd do anything to at least see my dad one more time," he said, looking up at the sky. "I guess that's why we connect so well, huh?"

Shuichi tapped him to get his attention again. 'Hey, remember that I love you, okay?'

Kokichi giggled. 'I love you too.' he signed back.

Shuichi quickly grabbed Kokichi around the waist and pulled him into a chaste kiss, laughing against his mouth when they pulled apart. Kokichi snickered and grabbed Shuichi around the neck to pull him in for another one, this one later longer and was ten times sweeter.

"Hey! Stop making out I want coffee!" Keebo complained from ten meters away.

Kokichi heard nothing. Shuichi flipped them off in a joking manner and continued to kiss Kokichi. He heard Keebo laugh at them before eventually coming over and basically dragging them to the Starbucks. "I honestly don't know what I'm going to do with you..." they muttered under their breath, but even Kokichi could see their smile.

"I don't know what you said, but I'm choosing to be offended by it," Kokichi commented, hopping up and jumping Keebo from behind in a koala hug so they had to carry him.

Shuichi laughed, his breath coming out in smoke as he did so. 'Kokichi, Keebo isn't that strong to begin with, so you should probably get off of them.' he signed.

Kokichi stuck his tongue out at him. "Fuck you, I weigh next to nothing!"

'Later.' Shuichi replied, smirking.

Kokichi let out a tiny gasp. 'Oooooh, I didn't know you were so smooth, Shumai~." he snickered.

Shuichi blushed but rolled his eyes anyways. 'I thought we were getting coffee.'

"We are!" Keebo replied, setting Kokichi down so they could sign. 'And I thought you were buying.'

Kokichi gave them a cheeky grin before grabbing both Shuichi and Keebo's hands and leading them to the coffee shop. "And I am! But if you dimwits don't translate for me I won't be!" he laughed.

Shuichi shook his head, releasing himself from Kokichi's so he could hug him from behind and kiss the top of his head. They didn't need words to tell each other they loved one another, that much could be told without voices.

As Kokichi preferred it, there is comfort in silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No, I don't condone littering, DON'T LITER GUYS THIS WAS SYMBOLIC AND IT'S FICTION SO IT'S FINE BUT DON'T LITER UNLESS YOU WANT ME TO TAKE YOUR KNEECAPS.
> 
> This is a threat.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> OH MY GOD IT'S THE END
> 
> NO I'M NOT READY-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE TRIBE HAS SPOKEN: No smut this time :)
> 
> No, I didn't make a Survivor pun, shut up.
> 
> Sorry to all of you that were disappointed by this, you can get your food somewhere else, there's like over 400 rated E fics on the SaiOuma tag. However, we are going to keep this fluffy this time with a few innuendos because my beta is a Miu Kinnie and it would be an insult to her if I didn't lol.
> 
> I hope you enjoy the last chapter and thank you all for the support! Platonic hugs and kisses being sent your way! <3

Shuichi blinked awake as his alarm blared beside him. He hugged Kokichi closer to him, not wanting to get up, gently tracing his fingers over the curve of his spine. Kokichi exhaled softly in his sleep.

Eventually, the alarm got so loud that Shuichi let out a loud groan and slammed his hand down on the snooze button. Just ten more minutes of cuddling, that's all he wanted.

Kokichi unconsciously (or consciously, Shuichi wasn't sure) pressed closer against Shuichi, which made the other so much more aware that there were only bedsheets between them. Shuichi closed his eyes and let Kokichi snuggle against him. Usually, it took an excessive amount of shaking to get the other up, or he would be awake even before Shuichi's alarm went off. Looks like it was going to be the former today.

And then he felt gentle kisses on his neck and jaw. Oh, would you look at that.

He looked down to see Kokichi smiling up at him. 'Morning sleepy head.' Koichi quickly signed.

Ever since the incident, a solid two months ago, Kokichi had been using sign a bit more and wasn't talking as much, mostly alternating between sign and speaking every other thing he wanted to say. Shuichi kind of missed his voice but he wanted whatever was most comfortable for his boyfriend.

Shuichi leaned down and carefully moulded his lips against Kokichi's, the other sighing and pressing back with just as much as Shuichi was giving. It only took half a minute and the soft tracing of lips with his tongue before Shuichi and Kokichi were completely connected at the mouth, Shuichi's hands winding into Kokichi's hair and the other resting his hands on Shuichi's shoulders. Neither one of them wanted complete dominance over the kiss, so it was just a gentle pressing of tongues and lips while holding each other close.

No morning sex today though, because Shuichi's alarm went off and reminded him he still had to get ready for work today. Shuichi cursed under his breath and sat up, lifting his arms over his head to stretch and shutting off his alarm. Kokichi sat up as well and leaned on Shuichi, obviously still sleepy. Shuichi kissed the top of his head before gently pushing him off of him.

That's the thing with their relationship now, little touches and visible signs could speak whole conversations between them now. It got to the point that Shuichi could even see through Kokichi lies, which were actually becoming rarer now, and Shuichi considered that a fucking miracle by any standards. 

He got out of bed and walked over to the closet, even though he knew Kokichi was staring at him, he's past the point of caring. He pulled on a black hoodie and sweatpants. 'Need clothes?' he signed to Kokichi.

"Unless you want me to walk around naked today in the fucking winter temperatures then yes." Kokichi joked. He was such a child sometimes.

Shuichi rolled his eyes fondly and pulled out some clothes he had bought specifically for his boyfriend and tossed them over. Kokichi pulled them on and then hopped out of bed to pull Shuichi into a hug. He was clingy. Shuichi loved him.

Shuichi smiled and kissed him on the forehead, then tapped him twice to he could talk to him via sign. 'We have to go if I do not want to be late.'

Kokichi grinned and grabbed Shuichi hand, pulling him downstairs and tossing him his jacket and hat. "Well then, we better get going!" he shouted.

Shuichi barely caught his items but slipped them on once he got a good hold on them. Kokichi was already dressed and was hopping on the balls of his feet. 'Hurry up, Shumai!'

This is the part where I mention Shuichi's sign name that Kokichi had given him. It was a take on the JSL word for 'detective' but also morphing into the letter for 'S', basically meaning 'Shumai'. Any other time Kokichi just finger spelt 'Shuichi'. Shuichi's sign name for Kokichi was 'Grape Panta', a joke that came from his boyfriend's favourite drink.

Anyway, the two linked fingers as they walked out and hopped down the snow-covered staircase leading down towards the street. They slowed down when they got to the sidewalk and Kokichi leaned against Shuichi, the two not really talking, because they didn't need words.

Within a few minutes, they arrived at the coffee shop and Shuichi immediately sighed when he felt the heater in the airlock. "Good morning, Shuichi, Kokichi!" Kaede called out, signing as she did so out of habit.

Shuichi smiled. A lot of changes had happened within those two short months. Kaede got exceptionally better at sign, Maki was trying her best, and even though she wasn't fluent, she was conversational enough to make small talk with Kokichi, Kaito had noticed the new 'trend' with everyone learning JSL and started learning with Maki, although he was kind of having a rough time and Kokichi constantly teased him for it. Shuichi had offered to help them both on multiple occasions and sometimes they'd accept, sometimes they didn't. Both of them were very busy with their own lives so Shuichi understood, the good thing was they were trying.

"Morning!" Shuichi called, running to the back, blowing a kiss to Kokichi who had already taken a seat in one of the booths before disappearing behind the counter. He came out a few minutes later in uniform to see Kokichi already with one of their peppermint lattes (a holiday special) in hand.

'You good?' Shuichi quickly signed to him.

Kokichi nodded, signing back, 'Yeah, might head out to go shopping here in a bit, I'll meet you here after you get off?'

Shuichi gave him a thumbs up and Kokichi smiled, winking at him.

Winters were usually a bit busier than normal since they sold hot drinks and people were always wanting something to warm themselves in the cold weather. Soon enough Kokichi did leave, and the moment he was about to walk out was the moment when Maki walked in. They made eye contact, and for a second Shuichi thought she was going to murder him but instead she nodded once and signed slowly, 'Hello Kokichi. Nice to see you.'

Kokichi beamed. 'Likewise.' he signed back and went out the door.

Maki breathed a sigh of relief. "I'm glad that was right," she admitted, going in the back and coming out in a flash, Kaede saluting before going back to take her break.

Shuichi leaned against the counter. "Hey, Maki, can I ask you something?"

"Shoot."

"I know you said before that you realized you were being insensitive to Kokichi from a conversation with Keebo, but you've never really told me what exactly they said that made you realize that."

Maki stiffened. She coughed. "Oh that. Um..." she shifted her weight from one foot to the other. "That was a long time ago... but I remember something they said about Kokichi losing his father right before he went deaf... and the amount of times they had to go to the hospital."

She started pulling on one of her ponytails. "You know I lost my mom and dad when I was younger, so I never really had any of those warm family moments. But Keebo told me that Kokichi had a hard time even communicating with what little family he had, and part of coping was being happy and putting on a mask to hide the pain. I'm sure you already know this..."

He did. Shuichi knew exactly everything she was talking about. Kokichi and Maki were different in a lot of ways, they weren't exactly the best of friends, but even so, they had come to a mutual understanding with each other. "It just... I can't even imagine not being able to communicate properly with you all. You and Kaede and Kaito are what keep me sane. Whenever I've thought about having that taken away from me I've always regarded it as an intrusive thought but..." she bit her lip. "That's Kokichi's reality. And I think when I realized that it finally sunk in. He's never heard your voice, the person he loves most of all. It's because I can't even begin to fathom how hard that is for him, for _any_ deaf person, is why I understood I needed to have a more open mind."

Shuichi smiled. "I'm glad you came to that conclusion," he spoke. "But, to correct something you said, Kokichi _has_ heard my voice. Only once, and it was with hearing aids. Hearing aids that he hated. But he put them in so he could hear me only once. So he knows what I sound like, but I do understand what you mean."

Maki puffed out her cheeks. 'You ruined the moment.' she signed carefully.

Shuichi laughed. 'Sorry.' he replied. 

"Shuuuuuuuuuuumaaaaaaaaaiiiiiii!" Kokichi whined from the couch.

Shuichi came in not half a second later carrying two bowls of popcorn. He set them down on the coffee table before signing, 'I was just about to come out, your whining was unnecessary.'

Kokichi smirked. 'Come out to me then.'

Shuichi was completely deadpanning when he signed back. 'I'm bisexual.'

'And I'm gay.'

Two seconds of silence, and then Shuichi snorted, which turned into the both of them laughing their asses off. Shuichi plopped down next to Kokichi once he calmed down and the other snuggled up to him, lolling his head on his shoulder. Shuichi picked up the remote and pressed play on the movie, Netflix already knowing what's up and presenting the subtitles.

They didn't even get halfway through the movie before Kokichi tapped Shuichi on the shoulder, the other turning to him only to get kissed firmly on the mouth. The movie was sorely forgotten when the two fell on top of each other, Kokichi trapped in Shuichi's embrace as he laid on his chest, kissing the life out of him.

This was kind of standard procedure for them at this point. Kokichi got bored of movies really quickly and usually, it ended in them making out for the rest of it, and sometimes escalated depending on who was home and who's house they were in. 

Kokichi pulled away from Shuichi with a small _pop_ and looked him dead in the eyes. "Love you~," he whispered.

'I love you too.' Shuichi mouthed, making sure Kokichi could read his lips.

Kokichi smiled and kissed him again, reaching up to cup his head and sink his fingers into Shuichi's soft hair.

This... this was what Shuichi wished he could do forever. This moment he wanted to replay until the day he died. Kokichi had become his everything, his entire world. Not to say his friends weren't important to him but everything just came back to _Kokichi_. He always gave him a reason to fall in love with him, every single day, and Shuichi was fine with that. He could even fathom the days when he didn't know JSL, and the memories of him learning specifically for Kokichi were a thing of the past now, but he cherished them more than you would realize.

He had the most incredible boyfriend right here in his arms, he couldn't ask for a better one. Sure, they had their ups and downs but what couple didn't? What matters is they loved each other. Even without the ability to communicate with one another with words, they were perfect just the way they were.

Shuichi wouldn't have it any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> COMMENT YA'LL'S SIGN NAMES BECAUSE MINE ARE ALL FOOD-RELATED
> 
> So yeah... this is the end... I think we ended on a good note if I do say so myself :)
> 
> Thank you again for reading and I can't even begin to voice (or sign) my thanks for all of your support! I'm sorry for sounding cheesy but that's just part of me.


End file.
